I would like to thank Hollywood for taking time out their busy schedules of sexual harassment, pedophilia, and Marxist activism to spend an evening condescending to walk amongst the peasantry, congratulate each other on your self-proclaimed moral superiority, and to lecture America on our moral deficiency.  Thank you for enlightening our ignorance and backward ways.  Thank you for your self-important moral posturing, without which the rest of America would be left to our own slack-jawed, numb-skull devices.  Devices like feeding you, producing energy, innovating, extending both the length and quality of life for the people of the entire world, bleeding and dying for your freedom, being faithful in marriage, raising our kids to work hard and to be honest, paying our bills and taxes, fighting crime, and putting out fires of all kinds.  Thank you for objectifying women on a scale that horrifies the average American, then turning around and scolding America for the rampant immorality that is metastasizing in your house.  Thank you for taking hypocrisy, self-importance, and self-righteousness to heights that we never even dreamed might be attainable.